A-plus, A-cup parenting

Couldn't help but share a few weird things I heard at Victoria's Secret today, all in the few short minutes it took me to exchange some sexy pajamas for practical beige bras. (You're welcome, Anthony.):

From a fellow shopper:
"Do you know if we can try things on? I've never been to this store before."

What I wanted to say: "Are you from Earth?"
What I actually said: "Yes, probably everything but the underwear."

From the customer service gal:
"Would you like a free stuffed dog with your purchase?"

What I wanted to say: "Who the hell is your target market?"
What I actually said: "Roman, look at the cool prize you won!"

(He now loves this odd little dog.)

And, finally, from Roman, looking perplexed while I tried on bras:
"What is that? Is it to cover your nickels?!

That's right, sweet shopping parter...a girl's gotta keep her nickels under wraps.