Kid Drills

Today, as we left the doctor's office with stitches in Benny's head (he's fine, but more on that later), I had an idea for a hybrid class - parenting and exercise, rolled into one. It could be called Kid Drills and it would be - you guessed it! - a series of fix-it/respond-to-it/clean-it parenting emergencies.

Because anymore, the typical parenting class topics - bathing, swaddling, feeding - just don't apply to us. Most of our days are a series of kid-related drills that get my heart racing as if I was suffering through a spin class.

So, while I'm grossly underqualified to teach a parenting class, I'd at least like to submit a few topic ideas:

• Sweeping up a broken glass before anyone steps on it
• Sunscreening children before they get wet
• Cleaning up barf at (insert retail establishment here) 
• Finding lost, beloved blankies and bears in time for bed
• Covering your lady business when kids barge in on your shower
• All things that follow the comment "there's poop all over the..."
• Dressing kids and getting them out of the house in under two minutes because you forgot a speech therapy appointment
• Navigating air travel

And the final exam:

• Handling medical emergencies

Because, this morning, we went from this:

 To this:

That's Benny on Dr. Kumar's exam table with a gash on the back of his sweet head. He hit his head when he swung into a nearby cabinet edge. And, yes, he's wearing the most ironic shirt ever.

Now, we've had our fair share of ER visits, but it's still a baffling, frightening guessing game. Am I over-reacting? Under-reacting? Where do I take him? ER? Doctor's office? Funny farm for all of us?

Today we settled on the doctor's office (I'll call that middle-reacting), and got out with two stitches and only slight emotional distress. Ben will surely be back on the climbing wall soon, but I'll be putting in a request for bumpers on the sharp edges (duh?).

Thankfully, every drill-filled day (and every exercise class, for that matter) is made better when followed by Chipotle, Ben and Roman's fave. It's a drill we know well. Now, time for Advil and naps...